Have you heard the one about the lush who got a Christmas job as a department store Santa Claus?

“Well fortified by booze, he was doing okay until he breathed heavily into the face of a child on his knee. Repelled by the alcoholic fumes, the little girl jumped down and cried, “You’re not Santa Claus! You’re my daddy!”

( From the AA Grapevine Once Over Lightly at http://www.aagrapevine.org/da/grabbag.php )